The winter holidays are supposed to be a season focused on creating joy and togetherness. Unfortunately for many, they have become a spiral of obligatory gift-giving, events to attend, checklists to complete, dinners to plan, and so on, often burdening us with financial strain and anxiety. This is why it is important to consider abstaining from this social pressure and try to reframe the act of gift-giving. The imposing idea that we must endure the weight of certain obligations during this festive time, particularly regarding gifts, brings to light the need for a shift in perspective.
These days it seems like our money, time, and energy are all overextended, but we’re also desperate for human connection and belonging. By focusing on the significance of meaningful gifts that do not bring about a financial burden, we can begin a new tradition—one that prioritizes the time, thought, and sentiment put into a gift over its monetary value. When we give handmade gifts, we have the chance to foster genuine connections and authentic celebrations during this cherished time of year. Even if it’s not made with the utmost craftsmanship, a thoughtful gift is almost always treasured.
Last year we hung fruit and birdseed in the woods (winter solstice wildlife trees)
with the niece and nephews— a much-loved holiday tradition.
Finding the time and energy to make a gift by hand can feel like a different kind of burden. Personally, handcrafting a gift is something I look forward to. It’s an escape from the stresses of life for me, so it never feels like a burden. It feels much worse to waste hours online, searching for the perfect gift that is both within my budget and something the person will actually enjoy (that isn’t from Amazon). I selfishly revel in the act of gift-giving. Giving someone I care about something I made or put a lot of thought into is like telling them “I really reflected on you as a person while making this, and I tried to make something especially for you”. Even if I miss the mark, at least they know I care about them— at least that’s how I feel when someone gifts me something they’ve made. I always value thoughtfulness over money spent (because to be honest, the valuable things I actually need cost a lot of money and would be completely unreasonable gifts, i.e., covering my utility bills for a month, another tattoo, art studio equipment, etc.). I believe this is the case for many of us.
But… What if You’re “Not Crafty”?
When I meet someone new and I mention that I enjoy making art, sometimes people respond with something along the lines of “I don’t have a creative bone in my body”. I don’t believe that’s true of anyone. Humans are imbued with creativity from the beginning, it’s just a matter of play, confidence, and practice. The more you make something (whatever it may be) for fun, for yourself, or for others, the better you will get. You just have to try it, let yourself be bad, then let yourself get better. Don’t let yourself fall victim to the convenience of Mr. Bezos’ empire. If you’re totally against making a gift, please consider buying one from a small, local business! Contributing to your local economy contributes to community resilience in a big way.
Anti-Consumerist Gift Guide
As someone who has years of experience handcrafting gifts– good and bad ones– I want to share a little collection of ideas I’ve gathered over the years. The most important part of this gift-giving style is knowing the recipient. Compile a mental or physical list of things your recipient enjoys including things like their hobbies, their favorite music, art, foods, colors and textures they appreciate, and so on. Ask people close to them if you need to get some ideas flowing. Maybe they mentioned something in a shop they liked a while back– what did they like about that thing? It takes a bit of thinking and meditating on the person to get an idea of what they would appreciate in a gift. It helps me to jot down a list or mind map in this part of the process.
After you’ve pinned down some ideas, here are some handmade or easily obtainable gift ideas to consider. I’ve broken them down into a few categories: Handmade & Crafty (for the self-proclaimed “creative type” of giver), Quick & Simple (for those who “don’t have a creative bone in their body”), Time Together, and Gifts of Service (for those who don’t have time or creative energy now but still want to show they care). *None of these are affiliate links, just a list of my ideas with how-to’s I wanted to share.
Photo by Olga Serjantu on Unsplash
Handmade & Crafty
Candles for winter warmth and coziness: https://www.thehealthymaven.com/homemade-aromatherapy-candles/#tasty-recipes-29462-jump-target
Soap for self care: https://thethingswellmake.com/making-a-basic-beginner-soap-and-then-making-it-fun/
Art for an authentically beautiful space: Maybe you have art you’ve made in the past you want to share or maybe this is a chance to get inspired and make something new!
Jewelry for a taste of opulence: https://www.gathered.how/arts-crafts/jewelry-making-ideas
Hand sewn, knitted, or crocheted items for fashion + function (reusable bags, art supply holder, apron): https://www.craftsy.com/post/how-to-sew-an-apron/
Handmade bird feeder: You can use thrifted or items you already have such as a teacup, or you can build a simple one with wood and string.
Photo by Beth Macdonald on Unsplash
Quick & Simple
Baked goods for comfort and joy: https://www.thekitchn.com/homemade-food-gifts-that-travel-well-214024
Infused oils for a savory, nutritious treat: https://www.lucismorsels.com/diy-holiday-gift-infused-olive-oil/#recipe
Sourdough starter for the gift that keeps on giving: https://www.theperfectloaf.com/7-easy-steps-making-incredible-sourdough-starter-scratch/
Ingredient jars for anyone: https://thecottagemarket.com/35-of-the-best-mason-jar-food-gifts/
Used books, vinyl records, vintage items, etc. Repurposing > buying new
Saved seeds, tree or plant cuttings, potted native plants
Time Together
At-home movie date: popcorn included
Thrift store/antique shopping date
Park, museum, or gallery date
Board game night
Picnic date with all their favorite foods
Gifts of Service
House cleaning for someone who’s always busy
Childcare or pet sitting for an evening away
Lessons if you have a skill to share (painting, music, knitting, preserving, mending, woodcarving, etc.)
Fern the Fireside Farm Cat enjoying some winter rest
Reframing the Act of Giving
Ultimately, the winter holidays shouldn’t feel like a dark haze of dread, stress, and overspending. We should be able to prioritize rest, caring for ourselves, caring for others, and getting through the long nights together. If we can reframe the act and expectations of giving during the holidays, maybe we can inspire our loved ones to do the same, creating new and long-lasting traditions. If you are like me and look forward to gift-giving, I hope you found some inspiration here. If the idea of gift-giving makes you want to pull your hair out and hide away until the new year, I hope that you find contentment in time spent with loved ones or time spent recharging and enjoy a stress-free holiday. Above all, I hope we all can find some genuine connectedness this holiday season. I know we’re all yearning for it.
Take care and happy holidays,
Allyson
*This post was originally published at foxhollowfarm.substack.com/p/hand-made-is-heart-made on December 11, 2023.